Recently, I experienced first-hand why "plus" isn't always an exciting thing. Sometimes it's less; sometimes it hurts. You can probably imagine at this point that I'm speaking of the term "Plus-sized". Listen, I hear ya, big is beautiful. Small is beautiful. Human is beautiful. I whole-heartedly agree with all of those! I'm only upset because someone else chose that category for me. I didn't have a chance to reckon with it and accept it for myself.
Ari and I had our wedding this year, and I felt a way I've never felt before: perfect. I felt classic. I felt sexy. I felt so put together, and thanks to my friend and makeup artist, my deep-wine lipstick scorched through the night like a beacon of saturated beauty. I had four generations of strong women in my family there by my side. The man of my dreams wept at the prospect of forever with me, and I wept, too. Our son looked me in the eye and said, "Mommy PRETTYYYYY"! It was literally the most wonderful day for my confidence.
It's amazing how one little thing can totally kidnap your sexy. In this particular instance, my wedding, in all it's purpley glory, was featured on a popular wedding blog. When I found out, I was so flattered! Someone enjoyed the pictures of my wedding details, I had to see for myself! I followed the link to the blog and it was a plus-sized bridal blog. My mouth sat ajar and I just though..."what?" I didn't know. I was shown, in that very moment, what I looked like through someone else's eyes. Let me stress two things before I continue: I truly do not believe this person maliciously submitted me to a blog that would knowingly hurt my feelings. She's very sweet and very kind. Thing number two, the brides on the blog are GORGEOUS, and I am honored to be featured among such beauties! But the fact remains, I didn't know that's what I was...plus-sized. I've spent a couple of weeks trying to put on my big girl pants (no pun intended) and move on from this. I'm not generally such an emotional wimp. I'm doing alright with it, so far. Spilling my feelings into this blog post is helping. :)
I wish I could plant this little seed into the brains of those in the wedding industry: Categorize people with the utmost care. Just give the client a quick thought and consideration before you submit your artistic work to niche blogs. Would the couple like to be viewed as plus-sized, or are they okay with it? Does the 40-something bride really want her wedding photos on Cougar Brides, or might that be a little hurtful? If you're not sure, just ask her. She'll appreciate that you valued her self-worth above your advertisement opportunity.
(Inset: First hair and makeup trial for the wedding)
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